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中國留學生畢業典禮演講:我來自中國,想傾聽世界的苦難

發布時間:2019-06-14來源:威久留學

本文源自哥倫比亞大學口述歷史專業2019屆畢業生字同學作為學生代表,于今年哥大文理研究生院研究生畢業典禮上的演講。

這是一個關于傾聽的故事,有他人的激情、脆弱、歧視和困苦,也有作者本人的愛與痛,掙扎與希望。

 

 

感謝Alonso院長。

尊敬的Tolstoy常務副校長、各位老師、家人、朋友,以及哥大文理研究生院2019屆的碩士畢業生們,

Thank you Dean Alonso; Executive Vice President Tolstoy; faculty and staff; family; friends; and of course, the MA Class of 2019,

我的媽媽依然沒能搞明白我在哥大學的是什么專業,她也不是唯一一個不明白的人。

My mom still doesn't understand what I was studying at Columbia, and she is not alone.

我接觸到的99%的人都不知道什么是口述歷史。可能也是因為我的發音,在我嘗試解釋之后,75%的人都會回答說:“噢,這和我了解的藝術史不太一樣。”

About 99% of people I have talked to have no idea of what oral history is. I guess because of my accent of pronouncing it, after my attempts to explain, 75% of them would say, "Oh, that's little bit different from what I thought of art history".

我不怪他們。與傳統的歷史研究相比,口述歷史是個相對年輕且不太知名的領域。在口述歷史學,我們通過采訪,了解過去,研究歷史。

I don't blame them. Compared to the traditional historical research, oral history is a fairly young and less well known field, which is the study of history by interviewing people who have personal knowledge of the past.

1948年,歷史學家兼記者艾倫·內文斯在哥倫比亞大學設立了世界上第一個學術化的口述歷史項目。

In 1948, historian and journalist Allan Nevins created the first institution-based oral history program in the world, right here at Columbia.

自那以后,哥倫比亞大學口述歷史研究中心就成為了超過兩萬小時采訪錄音和轉錄文稿的基地。

Since then, the Columbia University Center for Oral History Research has become the home of over 20,000 hours of recorded and transcribed interviews.

今天,哥倫比亞大學也依然是美國唯一一所頒發口述歷史碩士學位的學校。這也是我來哥大的原因。

Today, Columbia is the only university in the country that offers the graduate program which solely focuses on oral history. And that's why I came to Columbia.

我還記得告訴媽媽我想在讀研期間學習口述歷史的那一天。

I remember the day I told my mom that I wanted to study oral history for graduate school.

她一輩子都住在中國。在中國,口述歷史研究比在美國更加少見。她非常困惑,但她依然想要表示支持,所以她立刻回答:“去吧!我相信你肯定能學得很好!”

She has lived in China her whole life, and oral history is even less known in my motherland. She was very confused but she wanted to be supportive. So she immediately replied, "Go for it! I'm sure you will be good at it."

幾個小時之后,她問我:“所以,寶貝,你剛剛說想學的那個專業是做什么的?你知道我很愛你,但是我只是想問,你確定畢業以后能找到工作嗎?”

Then after few hours, she asked me, "So sweetie, what was the thing you said you wanna study? And you know I love you, but are you sure that you can find a job after graduation?"

是的,未知確實讓人感到恐懼,但當時,我依然只申請了一所學校,然后我被錄取了。就這樣,我成為了哥大口述歷史專業第十屆碩士學生。

Yes, the fear of an unforeseen future was real. But still, I only applied to one graduate program, I got in, and I became a member of the 10th Cohort of Oral History Master of Arts.

過去的一年里,我們了解了許多口述歷史的研究和實踐方法。但如果你想讓我用一句話總結,我會說,在這里我學會了如何“傾聽”(listen),不僅僅是“聽見”(hear),而是傾聽,真正的傾聽。

Throughout the program, we learnt a lot about the methodology and practice of oral history. But if you want me to sum it up into one sentence, I would say, I learnt how to listen, not hearing, but listening. Truly listening.

一開始,區分“聽”和“傾聽”對我來說有些困難。在中文里,我們用“聽”這一個詞來表示聽和傾聽兩種意思。對我來說,“傾聽”就是“聽”,它們都意味著用耳朵來接受信息。

At first, it was difficult for me to differentiate listening and hearing. In modern Mandarin, we only use the word 聽 to express both hear and listen. For me, listen was hear, hear was listen, just like 聽 was 聽, receiving information with one's ears.

然而,在哥大的學習過程中,我被反復告知,對于一個口述歷史學者來說,僅僅聽見你的采訪對象是不夠的。你必須保持敏銳,在采訪時專心致志、時刻思考。你必須傾聽。

However, I was told multiple times throughout the program - for an oral historian, hearing your interviewees' stories was not enough. You have to be alert. You have to give consideration and thoughtful attention. You have to listen.

所以,我盡我所能去傾聽。

So I tried my best to listen.

2017年秋天,我開始了在哥大的第一個口述歷史專題。我與Wikipedia的AfroCrowd項目組合作,探訪紐約地區的少數族裔和語言社群。

The first oral history project I conducted at Columbia was a project I collaborated with AfroCrowd, Wikipedia in Fall 2017, focusing on the marginalized ethnic and linguistic communities within the New York City area.

在那個學期,我采訪了一位反種姓制度的達特利社會活動家。她在三歲的時候,因為皮膚比別人更黑,在學校里遭到歧視和霸凌。

During the semester, I listened to a young anti-Caste South Asian Dalit activist talking about the story of being discriminated and bullied in school because of her darker skin when she was three.

我采訪了紐約大學的一位教授兼海地語語言學家。曾經,她用自己的母語海地克里奧爾語說話時,有陌生人靠近并試圖糾正她“糟糕”的法國口音。

I listened to an NYU professor and Haitian linguist telling the story of being approached by a stranger who wanted to correct her "poor" French when she was speaking her mother tongue Haitian Creole.

我還采訪了一位音樂家,他講述了自己在布魯克林的布什維克的創業故事——他在自己的社區里教孩子們黑加勒比人音樂。

I listened to a musician telling the story of starting his music entrepreneurship in Bushwick, Brooklyn and teaching Garifuna music to the children from his community.

我傾聽的故事多種多樣,它們關乎激情、痛苦、童年、脆弱、自尊、歧視、女性和愛。

I listened to the stories of passion, of pain, of childhood, of vulnerabilities, of pride, of discrimination, of womanhood, of love.

在傾聽馬里、薇妮和詹姆斯(譯者注:指上文提到的三位采訪對象)的過程中,我記錄下這些平凡的人們為了守護自己的文化傳統,以個體的力量各自戰斗。

During my journey of listening to Maari, Wynnie, and James, I found myself documenting ordinary people fighting to preserve their heritage from an individual and intimate approach.

我開始直面自己對其他文化和語言的無知。我跟他們站在一起,從他們的敘述中,審視各種文明的復雜性和包容性。

I found myself facing my ignorance of other cultures and languages. I found myself standing with them, reviewing on the complexity and inclusivity of civilizations that surfaced from personal narratives.

我開始明白,傾聽不僅僅是口述歷史學家的工作。沒有人是一座孤島,當別人想要訴說自己的故事時,我們有義務留心傾聽。因為無論是低語還是吶喊,每個人的聲音都很重要。

Then I realized the ability to listen should not merely be an oral historian's job. No man is an island. We own the obligations to be mindful when others are trying to tell their stories, because every personal voice, mummering or loud, matters.

在口述歷史學中,我們相信個人的就是政治的,個體的就是公共的。

In oral history, we believe what is personal is political, what is individual is public.

我的文化人類學教授曾經告訴我,對現在的媒體來說,周五晚上哪個球隊贏得了橄欖球比賽,比在某個非西方國家發生的恐怖襲擊要重要得多。她說:“非西方國家發生的慘劇在新聞播報中只有30秒,且在這些國家里發生的悲劇是唯一會被報道的事。”

My cultural anthropology professor once told me that in today's media, a terrorist attack in a non-western country is not even as important as which team won the football game on Friday night. "The TV will only give 30 seconds to the non-western tragedy, and tragedy is what they only report on these countries", she said.

 

 

對這些聲音的忽視鼓勵并滋養了今天社會、媒體和政治談話中對特定群體的無知和歧視。我們身為未來世界的希望,應該做出改變。

The neglecting of some voices encourages and fosters arrogance and discrimination towards certain communities in today's society, media and political context. And we, as the promising future of our world, need to change that.

如果你問我,傾聽的旅程該從哪里開始,我會說:從傾聽別人生活中的掙扎開始。

If you ask me where to start the journey of listening, I would say, start with listening to other people's struggles in life.

在哥大讀書期間,我失去了兩個摯愛的人。

I lost two loved ones during my time at Columbia.

我的好朋友楠在2017年11月因癌癥離世。而在我寫碩士論文期間,從小養育我的姥姥也離開了人世。我難過萬分,逐漸支離破碎。

My good friend Nan died of cancer in November, 2017. Then I lost my grandmother who raised me since I was a baby while I was working on my thesis. I was devastated, gradually falling apart.

我不記得自己有過多少個無法入睡的夜晚,盯著天花板,就好像它能告訴我答案一樣。

I lost track of how many nights I couldn't fall asleep, staring at the ceiling like it would give me an answer.

我不記得自己有過多少個無法清醒的早晨,躲避著日光,就好像這樣能夠逃離一切。

I lost track of how many mornings I couldn't wake up, hiding myself from the sunlight like I could escape from everything.

我也有過許多自我懷疑的時刻——我真的可以完成這個學位嗎?我真的可以從痛苦和悲傷中走出來嗎?

There were many moments I doubted myself, would I ever be able to finish the program and move on with all the pain and grief?

然而,在哥大,有人聽到了我求助的聲音。不,他們不僅聽到了,他們還傾聽了我的掙扎。

However, someone at Columbia heard my creaking for help. No. They did not just hear it. They listened to it.

我的項目主任瑪麗·馬歇爾·克拉克、艾米·斯泰爾徹斯基,還有我的教授蓋里·埃爾波爾里,他們陪伴著我,傾聽我的痛苦,給予我理解和幫助,耐心地等待我從黑暗中走出來。

My program directors Mary Marshall Clark, Amy Starecheski, and my professor Gerry Albarelli were there, paying attention to my struggles, offering me understanding and help, and waiting for me to save myself from darkness with patience.

我清楚地記得艾米的郵件,還有在瑪麗·馬歇爾辦公室里的寧靜,她花了很多時間傾聽我的痛苦,并讓我相信,我的脆弱可以轉化為力量。

I remember Amy's emails. I remember the quietness of Mary Marshall's office, where she spent hours listening to my pain and convincing me that my vulnerabilities could be converted into my strength.

最終,我記錄下了自己經歷的愛與死亡,以此完成了畢業論文。

Eventually, I finished an oral history article documenting my personal account of love and death as my graduation thesis.

現在,我從事著一個我真正信仰的工作,在全世界的社群傳播有價值的思想。換句話說,如果當初沒有人傾聽我的掙扎,我現在就不會站在這里。

I landed in a job I truly believe in, bringing the ideas worth spreading to local communities around the globe. In other words, I couldn't be here without their listening to my struggles at the first place.

2019年的畢業生們,希望我們這代人不要回避走心的對話。請你們作為家人、伴侶、朋友,傾聽他人。

So my fellow of 2019 graduates, don't become the generation that is afraid of mindful converSATions. Go listen, as families, partners, and friends.

傾聽并不意味著你能夠立刻解決他們的問題,但傾聽本身會讓他們感受到自己被重視。

Listening to others will not automatically grant answers to their questions, but your listening will make someone realize they are valued.

有的時候,一個迷失的靈魂只是需要被一個人傾聽。

Sometimes one's lost soul just needs to be heard by one listener.

同時,也請你們作為社群的一員和關注社會的公民傾聽世界。傾聽來自不同文化、政治和社會經濟背景的人,用另一個視角理解你以為已經十分熟悉的世界。

Go listen, as members of communities and concerned citizens. Listen to people from different cultural, political, and socio-economic contexts. Listen to their perspectives of the world you thought you were familiar with.

讓我們在每日的傾聽中,再次成為一個謙虛的學生。然后運用我們在哥大收獲的知識和資源,傳播那些話語,搭建橋梁,改變或許就會隨之到來。

Become a humble student again in everyday's listening. Then utilize the knowledge and resources we harvested at Columbia, spread the words, build bridges, and wait for the changes you want to see in the world.

幾個月前,我的媽媽從中國來看我。她讓我帶她去看看校園中我最喜歡的地方。

My mom visited me from China few months ago. She asked me to take her to my favorite place on campus.

我帶她去了Lerner Hall里,那塊滾動著超過151個國家和地區名字的電子屏幕前。每一天,它都提醒著我,為什么自己一開始會選擇哥大:為了多樣的故事——那些不同的文化,不同的聲音。

I took her to the wall rolling the names of more than 151 countries at Lerner Hall. Everyday, it reminds me why I chose Columbia at the first place, for the stories, of different cultures, and of different voices.

謝謝大家,恭喜2019屆的畢業生們!今天是令人激動的一天。讓我們共同慶祝,并從今天開始,傾聽別人的故事。

Thank you and congratulations again to my fellow class of 2019! It's an exciting day. Let's celebrate and enjoy, and start listening to other people from today.

希望每位留學生的大學生活都能有一個完美的Happy Ending。了解更多出國留學資訊,可隨時和威久留學專家聯系。

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